new blog (;

somehow or another my last blog entirely won't let me post anything. yet, even sign in half of the time.
hence, the NEWblog.
which in fact is sort of refreshing. granted, i can still see the posts i wrote all summer up until now... and quite frankly the idea of a NEWblog excites me. yea somewhere out in cyber world my OLD blog still exists. with my cut downs, my words of hatred, my thoughts of the "NEW me" a better me. my emotions, my anger, my happiness, my ups and downs. my life pretty much in word form.
and here i go yet again, opening my life up to people. not even knowing who really reads this.
it's kind of intriguing writing not knowing who really looks at my blog. it's therapeutic, in a weird way.

the last month has been nothing short of a roller coaster. at times i wanted to jump off my own roller coaster. i was over the ride. but ironically... i'm still on.
holding on. strapped in. ready for what the next toss and turn to be. round and round, up and down.
let's go. roller coaster.

i've learned a lot this past month. from my new friends, from old and distant friends.
to a girl;a BESTfriend who is stronger than i could ever be, thank you for giving me hope in myself. for making me feel loved. (you're going to be OK;iLOVEyou!)
to a new friend who helped me at my lowest point, i thank God for bringing you into my life.
for a boy who broke my heart, for a boy i hurt to make myself feel better... i am sorry. people deserve second chances, love deserves a second chance.
for a friend who is missing in my life... i don't know you anymore, and i miss you.
and for the people who have impacted me and stood by me and believed in me and myDREAMS.
thankYOU!
and to the cd that has gotten me through it all... and been on constant repeat.
taylorswift. says all the things i want to say; and NEVERcould.thankyou (;


i'm ready for the next turn, next up side down roll around curve.
my lifeisPERFECT. in every sense.
i have blessings that others could ONLYdream of.
when i think i have it worse; there are others that have it just as WORSE.
faith.prayer.happiness.
threeiNEED.

let's go november... bring me a surprise (;
... i'll be waiting.